The Dark Side of Love: Why Girls Always Have Some Love for Their Ex-Boyfriends


Many girls will say that they love their boyfriends unconditionally, but it’s not uncommon to find that these same girls will still harbor some feelings for an ex-boyfriend.

Does this mean that love isn’t as powerful as we think? That the notion of unconditional love isn’t real? Not necessarily, but it does open up an important discussion about the dark side of love and how to deal with it before it eats you alive.

Love Hormones

There’s a reason why most girls say, I just can’t forget about him! Just like love, there are hormones associated with falling in love—and one of them is oxytocin. In fact, it helps to bond us to our partners and makes it easier to trust them. The problem? After a relationship ends, we don’t stop producing these hormones.

Sex Drive Differences

While some girls definitely have a stronger sex drive than their partners, (this is often true in polyamorous relationships, as well), many girls find that they are driven by their emotions while men are driven by other factors. Many women feel great desire when they have an emotional connection with someone else—whether or not it’s sexual.


Stable Relationships

Although it’s a really nice feeling to be loved by someone, relationships are not always healthy. In fact, people usually find themselves unhappy in their relationships if they are overly committed to them. If you’re currently dating your ex, you may want to consider ending things. And while there is no right time or wrong time to break up with someone, one thing is certain—when a relationship becomes unhealthy, both partners should be willing to give it up. Sadly, many couples (especially women) are unwilling or unable to end long-term relationships even when they know deep down that things aren’t right in their relationship. Many even fight against ending it out of love or fear of being alone.

His Flaws Become Her Strengths

Even if she has a better boyfriend now, a girl always remembers her exes’ flaws—not their good qualities. They might say oh, he was such an annoying person or he wasn’t smart enough to see what I saw in him. But they never forget their bad boy behavior or selfishness; in fact, they love that it wasn’t too serious because they can still keep tabs on him and see how successful he is without them.

She Tries to Make Him Happy After They Break Up

If you’re wondering why your ex still loves you, there’s a good chance she’s trying to make him happy. When someone who cares about someone else deeply is in pain, their number one priority isn’t themselves; it’s making sure their loved one is okay. If your ex wants to be with you and thinks that would make them happier than being without you, they might stay on friendly terms—even if they have no romantic feelings left.

Breakups Are Hard on Men, Too!

According to psychologists, men are far more likely than women to hold onto deep feelings after a breakup. Just because they aren’t crying or clinging doesn’t mean they aren’t suffering—or still in love. Here are three reasons why some guys just can’t let go.


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